Obviously I have been lost for a month or so - at least to my blog. It is the never-ending struggle of balancing my 'daily' life with my 'art' life, which somehow doesn't seem to co-exist very well during certain times of my life.
As you know, I don't have a 'day' job or a salary. So, what, EXACTLY, do I do with my time???
I've been trying to figure that out myself. When I do get down into my beloved, treasured studio - I am extremely productive. In fact, I am amazed sometimes at the amount of work I can get accomplished overnight. It is the 'getting down there' that is the problem at hand.
Unbeknownst to some, the work of an exhibiting artists entails caboodles of paperwork. Some days it feels like I have made work (let's say 1 day that week), but the rest of the time is spent marketing, proposing, begging for grant money, all in an effort to have that work get out to the public. I've been struggling with this, too. Is my work created just for me? Would it be enough to make it and keep it hiding here in my house? If I do keep it here, what does that make it? A hobby?
I think intent is so important here - my intent when I make objects or alter them is to make commentary on social issues. Therefore, I have a calling to do social interpretation . . . which, therefore, requires a society to interact with them. Would it not be so much easier if I just wanted to quilt something to keep myself and my loved ones warm? Here is my stick - that isn't enough for me.
So there. It isn't enough for me. So my calling is to make and my duty is to get it out there. Towards that end I had the 2 trips to Grand Rapids for Artprize in Sept/October. I still had my broken ankle and that made things more difficult - but the installations were great and it was seen by more than 10,000 viewers. I found out during that trip there is still much gender-bias in the art world. I am disappointed, but more determined than ever to move forward.
Also during October were 2 of my kids' birthday parties (Claire's 7th was a happening in and of itself) . . . more company and then in November I had the honor of being chosen as the first ever seed SPACE artist in Nashville, TN. [NOTE: seed SPACE is a lab for site-specific installation, sculpture, and performance-based art that brings attention to the excellence, diversity, and interest in contemporary art in Tennessee. seed SPACE brings in nationally recognized art critics to write exhibition essays.] My art reviewer was Chen Tamir the Director of Flux Factory, Queens, NY. seed SPACE is currently developing their website - I will provide their link when it becomes available.
Having an interview with a critic is not an easy thing. I am a very open person (obviously) - but I find that each time I have had a one-on-one with an art critic (including Linda Weintraub) the experience has cracked my art spirit wide open - even further than it was prior to the interview. I have likened it to having a living autopsy performed on oneself. I maintain that opinion. The benefit of going through this process is that the critic/reviewer, from their UNCONFINED PERSPECTIVE, can see all the connections and scars and various conditions of your lifework. Talk about insightful. Revelatory. Cathartic. I could go on and on.
This all brings me to the following responses about the experience: the first draft review is incredibly astute and I appreciated the seriousness with which Chen viewed the work and our interview. It is invaluable to me, as a developing artist, to have such direct and unconfined perspective on my works to date. Interestingly enough, these interviews always spur in me an even greater understanding of who I am becoming and my place in the world - let alone the deeper investigations with the works themselves.
There are many other things which have occurred, including the beginnings of several new series, but November seemed to focus on investigating previous works as they are being exhibited. Additionally, I have 3 years worth of blogs to re-load all the images for due to my Typepad/Wordpress transfer - total debacle!
As I move into December, it begins another year of my life - my 43rd. Although some have mistakenly dismissed me as a bored housewife, I can tell you - there is little that would be more difficult for me to attempt than to nurture my art at the same time I try to raise a family. If I only needed to be entertained, i can think of much funner, cheaper, and immediately gratifying than being an artist. It is not the easiest route. Forging a new path never is.
Read MoreDream in Color - in Honor of Shanna, Carrie, Maureen & Haven
In honor of Carrie’s Studio, Shanna's New Abode for Writing, Maureen's New Cottage for Writing, and after visiting Haven's Writing Barn, I am offering up this Dream I had:
Background Information: I always loved art as a child and would study on my own, but I went to a tiny church school with no art class. At this time in my family/community no one mentioned even the possibility of college . . . I thought when you graduated and/or turned 18, you were on your own.
So, after high School I worked full-time, moved in with an aunt in Texas, and then ran off and got married at 19. I kept painting, mostly watercolor and some acrylic, but not really knowing what I was doing. Got into the New Age movement . . . began to believe in my ‘gift’ and that it was part of my tautology.
After a divorce I enrolled in an Art Institute while still working full time.
One week before classes started I was in an accident and badly injured my back.
I met Donny (he was my physical therapist). We married and planned and started our family. The deal was, I would have art as a hobby and go to school when the kids reached pre-school age.
Above, 30 second gesture drawings from Drawing 101.
This dream (of returning to school) came true when I was 27/28. I started with a night drawing class . . . then before I started Painting 101 - I went shopping for art supplies.
choosing every tube of Galleria acrylic paint and each paintbrush with exceeding care and love . . .
I then had this dream while being part of a dream interpretation group.
FLOWER TRAIN.
I am on a swiftly moving SILVER BULLET train . . . we are flashing through landscapes and the train slows as we come around a bend. I peer out the window and see breathing, pulsing BRIGHT FLESH and CREAMY flowers of an unidentified species. They are singing and throbbing with color and life.
I reach down and pat the baby car seat which is sitting next to me on the train-bench. The 'baby' is wrapped in a beautiful crocheted (which I made) cobweb of rainbow beams . . . I lift the blanket to reveal -
the new glorious tubes of paint and carefully arranged paintbrushes. I cry in recognition.
THE END
Above, "Unveiled Sorrow" created in Painting 101 with Professor D. Anne Waters.
So - the point being that this dream is when I came to the realization that I needed to nurture and foster my ‘gift’ of creativity to the same extent that I nurtured and fostered my own children.
Our family, around the time of this dream . . .
Art is a part of me. I cannot give it away or neglect it.
I cannot tell you the all encompassing effect this realization/dream has had on my life. It was my license to be who I was born to be.
. . . and then came Claire.
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